In a world full of Kardashians, please don’t make a meme that uses “Kardashian” and “misogyny” in the same sentiment, unless you are talking about that time that Robert Kardashian helped acquit OJ Simpson of slitting his ex-wife’s throat for having the audacity to keep the company of another guy whose throat he also slashed, after a fairly well-documented history of domestic abuse.  Allegedly.

*rolls eyes*

Women are only really entitled to two things that are uniquely our own – keep your laws off my body and no means no.  These are non-negotiable and apply to every single woman from the local crack whore, right on up to Michelle Obama.  I will stand pat on that until I draw my last breath.

Beyond that, women don’t get any free passes as far as being celebrated or glorified, IMHO, so don’t cram your all-women-should-be-celebrated bullshit down my throat.  In fact, in the days before Zoloft made my life bearable, my general opinion of females was this – if I walk into a room of women, my baseline is “I hate all of you” unless and until you give me a reason to feel otherwise.

I’m sure as hell not celebrating any Kardashians any time soon.  Their family is a travesty.  This is not misogyny.  Misogyny requires that I make a determination about a woman without any information to substantiate it.  The internet is full of examples of why the Kardashians should be regarded with some combination of pity and contempt.

Women, in general, have a long and colorful history of deliberately fucking with other women, just to make them miserable.  I don’t celebrate that.  On the contrary, I enjoy delicious catharsis when I openly speak of women who have proven by example to be vile and contemptible, and I celebrate their failures both personally and professionally.  The fact that I am willing to openly admit that distinguishes me from the sea of hypocrites who will post this meme all over the internet to achieve a sense of purpose and acceptance, and to increase their number of followers and “likes”, but probably wouldn’t tell me if I had spinach in my teeth if I was standing right in front of them.

Now, this does not mean I don’t actively help build up the women around me.  If you are suffering, I am not going to mock you, I am going to offer my help.  If you are angry, you can vent to me, because I understand the value in that.  Hell, if you have diarrhea, I will give you Imodium.  That is how I help women in this world be and feel better.  I do this because people matter, not because some bitch made a meme.

So, in conclusion, please take this and all similar memes that give all women an award just for showing up and shove them up your collective asses.

Thank you.  Happy Fertile Zombie Day.  Zod bless.