Ian Quinn is that man with the terrible pun on that magazine cover and the subject of our search.

Phil puts the screws to Italian Hugo Strange and sips a tiny cup, I love it when a plan comes together.

The team goes under cover and no one seems all that pleased. Ward apparently speaks decent Italian.

Best thing about Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. how they write May’s character, because she MIC DROPS Ward and just climbs out a damn window.

Haha, Fitz and his American accent. Total win. It’s a tie with Simmons and her character prep. Damn these people are starting to grow on me.

STAN THE MAN ALERT. Awesome cameo.

May basically makes Wolverine seem like a chump strolling on top of that train.

Phil and Ward just say fuck it and jump off the train, must have been making room for some Under Siege 2 action.

Magical train disappear grenade? Is that like a Mohawk grenade?

Whoa, we are doing some non-linear story telling here. Phil with the Asgard joke!

Phil tells Ward to go science and yeah. Yeah. SCIENCE BAD. Dammit Ward, STARKTECH do you SPEAK IT.

Haha, Phil doesn’t even know Starktech. Jeebus. Abomination name drop. He is BARROW, ALASKA Masters of Evil, take note.

Seriously, get him back. Tim Roth killed that role.

Italian Hugo Strange shows up to NECK STAB CITY, population May.

May isn’t able to pull off the great train robbery. Ward and Phil are frozen like Popsicle.

I’m glad they didn’t got for the old keys in the visor trick (Non linear story time travel is tough guys).

Turns out sneaky bald goatee guys don’t freeze and he wants to get kinky with May.

May again proves why she is the baddest woman on the planet and takes down every motherfucker in the room down.

May isn’t in the mood for Ward to play den mother, Phil steps in the play Alfred to May’s batman.

Simmons goes all First Blood on the Polar Express.

And we’re back in time again, Skye and fits are compute ring and stuff. Fitz goes for a peep talk and Skye drops the I’m a dangerous item person thing card.

Skye and fits luckily remember they have a tracker and are hot on the trail.

Agents of let’s split up. Fitz styles to out bananas in their tailpipes and Skye goes in Jason Bourne style.

Looks like the man in the iron lung is Deathlok, because guys we meant that the whole time.

Holy robot leg Batman!

Mike isn’t home anymore Skye, if you’d like to leave a message…

Skye takes a bullet Mr. Orange style. Damn TWO BULLETS. Tim Roth ain’t got shit on her. You know if she lives through this with her mutant but not really mutant ability.

She’s fucking dying over here!

Shield just in time to save Fitz.

Ward strolls in like agent 47 and takes out everyone.

Phil goes bad cop and finds Skye. Skye goes into the hyperbaric chamber of secrets.

Everyone keeps yelling is it working, I mean the gauges look right. So I guess Skye is in a coma.

Touching moment between ward and May, Skye looks like the little girl from night of the living dead.

Stinger

And there is the Deathlok logo on Mike’s leg! I still iffy on if this was planned from the beginning.