Mid-series finale and it looks like The Blacklist will be back for a Second Season next year. Huzzah.

Agent IT Helpdesk was able to perform the System Reboot on a completely fake looking user-interface, but hey who am I to judge? At least that was more impressive than getting punched in the face. Lizzy is still reeling a bit and Agent Helpdesk isn’t so great at one liners. “Umm, yeah your ass is about to get kicked off the planet pal.” I’m shaking in my spaceboots.

Dembe is going to, oh thank god. Helpdesk managed to turn that bad guy off but not back on again. He seems a wee bit too excited about it. Lizzy is back into McClane mode, must be the bulletproof vest with shoulder flashlights. Aaaaand they’re captured.

Lizzy seems a bit put off by the constant drool streaming down our Blacklister’s face, I can’t say that I am quite impressed by it either. Spader seems to be sweating this a bit and tries to rouse Handsomeface from his blood lose sleeping time adventure. Spader slaps the shit out of him, then goes straight for the gapping leg wound. Damn. He’s cold blooded.

Director shuts down opening the box, what do we know about boxes being open dear readers?

Grandpa Glasses Hipster Husband gets a call through Lizzy and seems a bit taken back to be talking to Ivan Droolgo. Access code is Romeo, Spader spells it out for Drooly McTerrorist. A good call since his intelligence track record is less than stellar.

Of course Spader had a quip prepared. He had a whole episode and an 1/8 to sort it out.

Intro

I enjoy the Intro quite a bit on this show, quick and moves onto the show.

Despite having a major leg wound and lossing a colosal amount of blood, Handsomeface… he needs a new name. Too many handsomefaces. Mailboxhead it is, does anyone get that reference? Anyway, he manages to shoot a man with his back turned. A better showing then most of the FBI thus far.

Lizzy ended up being Spader’s kryptonite and at least Drooler was smart enough to pick up on that. Dembe manages to take out still more terrorists than the FBI all put together, Spader drops a North by Northwest reference and Lizzy is back in full on McClane mode for a few seconds until she drops and rolls.

Spader seems mostly just bothered that they are digging around in his shoulder and it looks like they used someone fast and furious to get away with the chip. Looks like their elaborate ruse paid off in Spades. Spader spades that is. How do you LOOSE a Spader?

Commercial Break

They having Spader strung up looking like the Scarecrow, under if he has any fear toxin up his sleeve? Not gonna lie dear reader, for a second I hoped when they took the hood off it wouldn’t be Spader.

Apparently Mrs. Claus just showed up to ruin Christmas, er the taskforce that has been shaking up with Spader. Lizzy isn’t able to Cindy Lou Who her way out of this one, she turns to Agent Helpdesk for assistance. It appears he respects Lizzy’s warrior like demeanor manifested in a McClane way.

Good god, can no one get this man a towel to wipe the corner of his mouth?! I know that he would shoot the minion that had the balls to do it, but totally worth it.

Hipster Husband had a total freak out and tells Lizzy that she needs to quit her job, doubt he is quitting his clandestine shit anytime soon. Lizzy blows him off because her phone is blowing up from Mr. Kaplan and Agent Helpdesk.

Turns out the calls were made by the creepy surveillance guys across the street.

Commercial Break

Back to interrogation of Spader, Drooler it turns out that he is just a Potsie to someone else’s Fonzie. They give Spader some reverse anesthesia. Man I bet he wishes he was upgraded to Spader 6 right now.

Lizzy commits a little B and E, no big deal. She finds out that they’ve been living on the Truman show for a while. Surprisingly she manages to get the drop on the person giving her the drop, but on the downside shot her only lead. Lizzy pretends that she butt dialed FBI director and instead goes Hitchcockian, hopefully she doesn’t have vertigo. Turns out Mr. Kaplan is on the Harvey Keitel scale of awesome.

Back to interrogation, Spader don’t play these reverse medical jargon tactics and just kind of giggles on his meat hooks. True story.

Lizzy uses her FBI training to locate the car of the guy she just plugged. Turns out this guy is not in any database, they go with the GPS as the best guess as to Spader’s location.

Hipster Husband spies from the window like so sad a panda.

Wow… Spader’s back up is like 100 times better than these mercs and those mercs were like 100 times better than the FBI. Thanks Obama.

Spader looks like he is about to piss out his kidney stones and probably his kidney along with them, maybe even his gall bladder. The mercs figure out they have company after their shit has been wrecked big time, turns out that Spader’s super team choose poorly…

Turns out that Hawkeye is Spader’s nemesis.

No, not that guy. THIS GUY.

Commercial Break

Turns out Director Cooper aka DB Cooper is mayhaps the turncoat but who knows, Mrs. Claus is not terribly happy that the elves did not shutdown the workshop.

Alan Alda offers Spader a chair, how gentlemanly. Turns out that these guys know that Spader knows that they know that he knows. Yeah. Ok.

Alda flexs his nuts, yes his old man nuts, and Spader seems to back down for now.

CIA agents compares Spader’s mercs to Drooler’s mercs, yeah you may want to review that. Turns out that Hollis Road is somehow connected into all this. Mrs. Claus decides that Christmas IS back on and these elves need to get to work.

Drooler wants a shot at Spader but Hawkeye does not seem to pleased. He seems to relent and let him have his drooling fun, instead he pushes Spader’s buttons about Lizzy and Spader just straight up murders him. Whoa.

The FBI shows up way too late to actually do anything, but Lizzy concludes that he was there. Must be her Spader sense.

Commercial Break

Hipster Husband lays it on thick to Lizzy, I suppose we should cut him some slack. You know, cut him some slack. Since he got gutted earlier in the season.

Mailboxhead ends up having a visitor show up that hospital, turns out he is a real lunkhead and maybe shouldn’t have blow this other chick off.

Mrs. Claus is dressed in black, maybe she is on The Blacklist? She wants Spader brought in.  It’s cute the FBI thinks they are going to hunt down Spader.

Lizzy is getting ready to move away or something, good thing they remodeled, as she touches the burned bunny she gets a call from Spader. He calls from a phone booth in a rather suspicious area, looks like he is ready to get on the boat for deadliest catch. Lizzy drops the Daddy issues and Spader says that he is NOT THE FATHER!

Spader drops the phone and we pull out to reveal he is in a city, maybe New York? And we’re done for the mid-season dear reader.