We open with Lizzy and Hipster Husband in bed, she apparently is into kinky shit like David Carradine.

Huzzah, they are getting a baby from a stork. Nope it’s an adoption agency, good thing their marriage has a solid foundation and its not being filmed like in Lost Highway.

This episode is all about creepy videotaping, maybe its some kind of metaphor? Bound guy stabs mask guy and asks “What are you?” well we all know how that goes…

Spader for coffee with SKINNY PETE! Wow, he cleans up well. Spader takes his coffee in fine china.

Back to the Angel Station Hotel, Handsomeface dumps some crap on Lizzy’s desk and her constant derpface doesn’t give away her reactions.

Lizzy busts handsomeface’s balls and Spader rings those digits from some obscure author’s house. You’ve probably never heard of him. Spader is apparently drinking moonshine, can he possibly get any cooler?

Villain/Blacklister of the week is another shirtless old white guy? Man, check your privilege Blacklist! Lizzy wants Spader to skip to the part where he has already done the work for the FBI.

So this creepy old white guys likes to sew extra nipples onto himself?

Commercial Break

We come back to a farmer’s market in Arlington, hopefully they find some free range organic terrorists. Lizzy is so good a surveillance, all teams start casually moving right. Because the FBI in this show has such a great track record.

Soviet military man is down, apparently that was not a bulletproof beard. CIA agent yells at some local farmer making him soil himself to add to his compost pile.

High-speed chase with a Jeep Cherokee and a Ford F-150, ‘Merica. I really don’t care for how they filmed this, its like speed up slow down film and it pretty much sucks. Lizzy is the one who makes the call when they ram someone, should have stolen a Dodge. Jesus this dude is basically the Terminator made flesh. Hey it’s the bad guy from that last awful season of Heroes.

He put what looks like an RFID tag into his flesh pocket, nothing sexual. Bad ass mofo just reset his bone and raised his broken arm since Lizzy and CIA are FREAKING clueless.

Spader tells them only what they need, nothing more nothing less. CIA goes for the torture technique. Umm, this John McClane motherfucker just reset his own bone and roughly raised that arm with barely a wince. I doubt he is going to crack. Spader tells Lizzy to call Doctor Love, or Matt Moline? Apparently he survived getting shot in The Dark Knight Rises.

Haha, evidence… inside of him. What you mean like in his butt? Nope flesh pocket. I’m really not sure what would be more gross at this point. Wow this dude is a creepy bastard, with no regard for his body. Your body is a temple creepy dude.

FBI actually does a bit of police work. Lizzy feels sassy with her hair clip and contributes to the discussion with a valid point.

Commercial Break

So it turns out their man in the box isn’t Layne Stanley sadly, he’s an NSA analyst! Oh good thing the FBI have their own Spader to talk to this creepy guy. Lizzy gets tough when Spader has a chuckle reading a Dear Abby letter. Spader brings up Hipster Husband and the gas is all out of Lizzy’s tank right when she is starting to be interesting.

Spader cuts the shit and gets back on track, hmm looks like The Courier is into Riding the Dragon. Right on brother, right on. Old school cool with the opium and weird flesh pockets.

Apparently the courier grew up in the RV that Jesse and Walt cooked up in, damn Walt for getting him on the path to drugs. Oliver Stone was right! Just like Magneto.

Apparently, they are putting creepy man in an MRI and cutting stuff off and he wants immunity. Ah, his name is Tommy and Lizzy found his brother and they are bringing him in. Brother queues us in that Lizzy doesn’t understand something and is maybe a sub-par FBI Agent.

Apparently Tommy’s dad was DMX and made Tommy fight the dog. So I guess a normal family life all puppy dogs and playing?

Spader clues the FBI into the fact that they are shit at planning but you know they don’t listen. Something about everyone Spader meets getting killed, it’s true he has a bad track record at killing people. Yeah, but they were all bad people.

Lizzy fucked up and Grandpa Glasses knows she knows about his crawlspace secrets. Whoa, IRL coyotes howling outside extra foreshadowing on that note.

Commercial Break

Handsomeface has to realize that the club can’t even handle him right now.

CIA was turned on by handsomeface going to town on the bouncer, must be her shoulder pads.

Okay, disregard what I said about Handsomeface being good undercover. All that smoothness has disappeared and he is in straight up robot mode. Uh oh she is called out Handsomeface on feeling pain, club owner lady calls him out and the jig is up. Damnit dude, you got your collar but come on that was sloppy and crappy.

Lizzy tells the senior agents on how to do their duty. Heh, duty. The courier apparently keeps tiny knives under his skin to pick locks without infection problems. Cool story bro.

Commercial Break

Back to the nation’s capital, and haha he had an item “hidden inside him”. He was carrying his own “escape package” Heeeyyyoooooo.

Spader quid pro quos the FBI into doing whatever he wants, Lumbly is scared that Spader is going to “screw him”. Man he need to get some hooker of the female and male variety in here and blow off some steam.

Spader drops the, we’ll always have Paris.

Club lady tries to play hardball but Spader is great at inside baseball with sicking the creepy man dogfighter on her. Cheek kiss and he’s about to leave like a pimp.

Handsomeface and CIA find the courier’s trailer, at least this guy is more reliable than Ontrac. Oh no, he peed himself. Wait sorry, its blood. Okay so this guy didn’t feel himself to death? Great plan bad guy. I was really hoping he’d be Lizzy’s Drop Dead Fred.

Commercial Break

I really hope that someday Spader comments on how the FBI’s incompetence has been his greatest ally. Spader is a glass half full kind of guy, maybe we make it in time for him to die!

So they found a refrigerator graveyard? A refrigerator graveyard is no place for a young NSA analyst.

NSA agent is not breathing, Spader has been dead for 2 minutes and we wouldn’t believe what he saw on the other side.

Spader labels the FBI and friends, nail on the head.

Spader is going to extort something from fridge-man. Handsomeface does the whole “you’ve done good rookie.” Lizzy keeps poking and questions Handsomeface about his sob story, way to blow the opportunity to connect.

Lizzy gets a mysterious package…

and her answers show up. Everything is classified, but looks like somebody got plugged. Maybe a double agent and her husband did the deed and has gone off the reservation. Skiny Pete points out that Spader wasted the favor they could have a longer story arc. Looks like Lizzy showed up for that drink after all. Cheers.

Visine tear and things are ending on a Mazzy Star sounding note. I do like that Skinny Pete let us in on Spader’s long game, Lizzy you came for the moonshine! Back to the Lost Highway view at Lizzy’s place. Shadowy surveillance guys are getting off on awkward city. Hipster Husband is Scarface in Flannel, he thinks it’s funny that they need to talk.

Say hello to his little top secret friend and we’re done for the week.

Final thoughts

The show is starting to pick up a bit more steam, we finally understand that Spader has someone that is after him that isn’t the incompetent FBI and they are a larger threat. Hipster Scarface Husband has blown the lid on Lizzy’s snooping so that is finally coming to a head mid-season. As always Spader has the mic and when he is ready it drops but sometimes it feels like he phones stuff in, not in this episode dear readers Spader brings his A game.